Mental health is now one of the most common reasons employees ask for support or take time off, and it’s a positive sign that people feel more comfortable speaking up. But many small business owners still feel unsure how to respond when someone’s wellbeing starts affecting their work.
Questions like these come up often:
“If they say it’s stress, can I still performance manage them?”
“Do I deal with their behaviour or talk about their health?”
“Am I even allowed to ask for medical information?”
The answer is that performance still matters, but how you manage it needs to be informed by whether health is playing a role. You don’t need special training to get this right, but you do need a fair, thoughtful approach.
Start With What You See
The safest starting point is to focus on observable behaviour rather than trying to guess what might be behind it. Instead of saying, “You seem depressed,” you could say, “I’ve noticed you’ve missed deadlines and been late several times this week.”
This keeps the discussion factual and gives the employee space to explain whatever they feel comfortable sharing. It avoids diagnosing, avoids assumptions, and keeps the focus on work.
Open the Door to Information
After raising the behaviour, a simple question helps you understand whether there’s a health factor:
“Is there anything going on that’s affecting your ability to do your work at the moment?”
If the employee chooses to share that stress, anxiety, or another health issue is affecting them, you can then talk about what support may help. If they don’t raise health at all, you move forward as a normal performance discussion, because you can only respond to what you know.
When Health Is Mentioned, Support Comes First
If mental health is raised as a factor, it’s appropriate to ask for more information, but only information that helps you understand what reasonable adjustments might be needed at work. You don’t need a diagnosis, you simply need to know whether the employee can carry out their normal duties, whether anything needs to change temporarily, and how long that’s likely to last.
With the employee’s consent, you may ask for a short medical note or request answers to practical questions, such as whether reduced hours, different duties, or flexibility might help them recover while still contributing to the business.
Expectations Still Matter
It’s important to remember that health challenges don’t remove the need to meet reasonable performance standards. What changes is the approach. You may extend timeframes, adjust duties, or offer support, but you still make expectations clear, monitor progress, and have honest conversations about what’s working and what isn’t.
Fairness means supporting the person and being transparent about what the role requires.
So Is It Medical, Performance… or Both?
Sometimes a situation is clearly performance related. Sometimes it’s clearly health related. And often, it’s a blend. For example, someone may have anxiety that makes concentration difficult, but they may also be avoiding conversations about deadlines or not communicating when they’re overwhelmed. In that case, you support the health need while still addressing the behaviour.
It’s not about choosing compassion or accountability; it’s about using both in the right measure.
Support Doesn’t Need to Be Complicated
Reasonable support may simply be more regular check-ins, a temporary change in hours, or clearer prioritisation of tasks. Support is most effective when it’s practical, genuinely helpful to the employee, and regularly reviewed. Documenting what you’ve agreed helps everyone stay aligned and avoids confusion later.
When to Ask for Help
If behaviour is escalating, the employee is frequently absent, medical information isn’t clear, or you’re unsure whether a situation should be treated as disciplinary or medical, it’s wise to get HR advice early. Sensitive situations can become messy quickly if they’re handled without clarity, consistency, or documentation.
You don’t need to be a counsellor to manage mental health at work. You just need to be fair.
See the person. Understand the impact on their work. Be clear about expectations. And put support in place where it’s reasonable to do so.
proHR supports NZ businesses to manage performance and health concerns fairly, safely, and with confidence. Please contact us any time for a chat if you need help.
